


We're better off when daddy's not around

by Ravenclaw_Scientist



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Cursed Child - Thorne & Rowling
Genre: Coming Out, Firewhiskey, M/M, Men in tight shorts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-18
Updated: 2018-03-18
Packaged: 2019-04-04 04:50:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,435
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14012547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ravenclaw_Scientist/pseuds/Ravenclaw_Scientist
Summary: In which Rose is nearly hexed by Scorpius, James has an alcohol problem and Albus worries about his possible immunity to firewhiskey.Co-written by Steph in danger Pret.For Manon, who belongs in London.





	We're better off when daddy's not around

Scorpius was having a moral dilemma. His dad had trusted him to stay at the Potters and stay out of trouble and Scorpius hated to let his dad down.

 

“He’ll never know, Scorp.” Said James, in a commanding voice. “I am not going to owl your dad with a photo of you making out with Albus because you’re drunk.”

 

Scorpius’s head snapped up. “Don’t. I would never!”

 

James chuckled. “Chill out. Stop being so defensive, you’re giving yourself away.”

 

“There is nothing to give away!" Scorpius paused, panicking slightly. “Just because you guessed that I was into guys-“

 

“Because I have eyes.” James interrupted.

 

Scorpius frowned. “Just because you caught me in a moment of academic weakness and I panicked and told you something _very_ personal. I do not fancy Albus!”

 

“Whatever you say. I’m just looking out for my brother.” James paused. “My gay as fuck brother.”

 

“No. He’s not. Is he? Has he told you something?” Scorpius stuttered.

 

“Have you told him something?” James replied quickly.

 

“No.”

 

“Then no.” James turned to face Scorpius, a cheeky grin on his face, exaggerating a wink. “He’s not.”

 

Scorpius tensed up, feeling anxious. Suddenly drinking seemed like an ever more dangerous idea.

 

“I imagine Al as a honest drunk. You should help me find out.” Said James.

 

Scorpius pondered this. “What sort of a drunk do you think I am?”

 

James thought for a second. “Al better hope you’re a slutty drunk.”

 

“Hey!”

 

James raised his arms. “Ok, ok. But seriously, what’s the worst that could happen? You can’t keep this from Al forever and the pining is driving me insane. I can’t keep living in a house where that much sexual tension is living too. It’s bad for my health.”

 

“You’re dramatic.” Scorpius mumbled.

 

“So you’re up for it?”

 

Something about James Potter was incredibly convincing, but the idea of losing control made Scorpius’s chest constrict.

 

“I’ll look after you. I’ve done this loads before. You just need to do this once and you’ll see that it’s all good fun! We’re home. The worst that can happen is you slip and fall into Albus’s bed.” James laughed at himself.

 

Scorpius sighed. “You’ll look after me?”

 

James put his hand on Scorpius’s shoulder. He was getting to like the Slytherin, even though he was weird and annoying, James felt like he needed a family. “I’ll make you a sandwich at 3am if you need it.”

 

Scorpius nodded and whispered. “Alright then.”

 

Albus bounded into the room, his hair still dripping onto the floor. “Everything ok?” He looked to Scorpius.

 

Scorpius stared back for a split second longer than he should. Albus with wet hair was his kryptonite.

 

“What?” Albus frowned. “Do I have shampoo all over my face or something?”

 

Scorpius stumbled over his words. “No. No sorry. Yes, we’re fine. When is Rose coming over? I’m good with the drinking plan.”

 

Albus couldn’t hide his excitement. James had described drinking as a liberating experience and Albus wanted to feel that too. “Really? Wow. Ok! Yes! I’m not sure, she said she would floo over from Grans around 6 but you know what Gran is like. Well, you don’t but it’s difficult to leave because she won’t stop feeding you.” Albus bounced over to Scorpius, ignoring James. “We could just start now.”

 

James snorted, unable to contain his amusement any longer. With some impressive wandless magic, he summoned three glasses and a bottle of firewhiskey that Albus was pretty sure Uncle Ron had given him for his birthday. James had a knack for doing the most useless spells with wandless magic. Summoning glasses? Easy. Summoning his textbooks? They’ll be lying at the other side of the room in flames.

 

“This isn’t shit stuff, boys!” James poured out more than a shot for each of them, not waiting for Albus and Scorpius to pick theirs up, and knocking the entire contents of his glass back.

 

“Ok then James.” Said Albus, examining his glass.

 

Scorpius had his nose in his, trying to figure out what the taste would be without risking this.

 

“Hey, Scorpius.” Albus nudged him. “If we’re doing this, we’re doing this together.”

 

Scorpius’s tummy did a little, albeit familiar flip. He grinned, tapping the side of his glass against Albus’s and raising it to his lips. The liquid burned his mouth as soon as it entered. It wasn’t entirely unpleasant but it was a shock.

 

Albus breathed out, his jaw wide, trying to release some of the heat. “Ouch.” He mumbled.

 

“Not as bad as polyjiuce.” Said Scorpius, looking at his empty glass.

 

“Could we mix this with something please James?” Albus asked.

 

“No. We’re not children.” James replied, pouring more of the liquid into their glasses.

 

“But it tastes bad.” Albus complained.

 

“It goes away after a couple of shots. You ok, Scorp?”

 

“So you care about how Scorpius feels but not your own brother?” Albus asked, some real offence in his tone. “I see how it is.”

 

“Shut up and drink more, little brother.” Said James, sipping from his glass. “Your voice is annoying me.”

 

“He loves you really, Albus!” Scorpius added.

 

“Maybe you should start sipping Scorp!” James laughed, continually filling his glass. He knew he probably drank too much but that familiar buzz at the back of his head was comforting and it wasn’t fair for Albus to be the only fucked up Potter child.

 

“Oh!” Scorpius gasped. “That feels nice.”

 

“What?” Albus frowned, looking into his glass. “Why isn’t mine working?” He moaned. “James!”

 

“Maybe we are related.” James poured another glass for Albus.

 

“The buzzing, Albus!” Scorpius grinned.

 

“Oh Merlin! What if it doesn’t work on me?” Albus paused. “Is that a thing? Could I be immune to alcohol?”

 

Scorpius pondered this for a moment. “There are some ethnicities who lack the correct enzyme to break down alcohol so they just get sick from it, but you’re white. So you should be fine.”

 

“I don’t know, Scorp. I think that was a rhetorical question.” James butted in.

 

“Nobody asked you, James.” Albus mumbled, sipping as fast as he could, considering how much he disliked the taste of it.

 

There was a flash of green light.

 

Scorpius jumped up, screamed and pulled his wand out of his pocket, aiming at a very confused Rose.

 

“What the fuck Scorpius?” Rose narrowed her eyes, trying to make sense of the scene in front of her. Both Albus and James were still sipping. Her lips curled into a smile. “Are we drinking? Fuck. Yes.”

 

“Sorry I didn’t get you a glass, Rose.”

 

“I don’t need a glass.” Rose shamelessly lifted the bottle to her lips and took an impressive gulp.

 

James raised an eyebrow. “I love you.”

 

“You know, if I was into you, which we have all established over the past year that I am not, I would be super attracted to you right now.” Said Scorpius, in a matter-of-fact tone.

 

“Why thank you!” Rose put her hand on her hip and drank a little more. “How much have you had?”

 

“Not enough.” James replied.

 

“Are we going to run out?” She enquired.

 

James shook his head. “I have another bottle upstairs if we require it.”

 

“Cool!” Rose walked across the room, filling up the glasses as she went and perched on the armchair by the window. “I need the TV on, the athletics is on. My parents think I watch this for the sport. I do not.”

 

“Why do you watch it?” Scorpius’s eyes were drawn to the TV as the Swedish men’s relay team walked on. “Oh. Got it.” He mumbled.

 

“Yeah.” Said Rose, dreamily, lounging back onto the cushions.

 

Albus frowned. “You’ve got it?”

 

Scorpius blushed. James leant back in his chair, preparing for the show.

 

“Do you not get it?” Scorpius asked, clearing his throat.

 

“Yes, I get it.” Albus replied.

 

“Ok.” Said Scorpius.

 

“Ok.” Albus paused and they fell into a slightly awkward silence. “I still feel nothing.”

 

“I’ll get the exploding snap” James jumped up and went to rummage in the chest of drawers for their deck of cards.

 

“See Albus!” Said Scorpius, randomly. “He does love you!”

 

“Please pay attention, Rose!” Said James, dealing them cards. “Every time it explodes, you down a glass.”

 

“Ok, this sounds like it might be fun. And dangerous. Dangerous is good. Let’s do this Albus.” Scorpius was feeling braver now he had a firewhisky buzz.

 

Rose laughed “Ok, let’s go James.”

 

5 rounds later and several near misses due to their slower drunken reflexes and Albus had finally conceded that the firewhisky was indeed working.

 

“I feel happy.” He sighed as he leaned his body into Scorpius as James attempted to clean the burnt remains of cards from the Potter’s carpet.

 

“Ok, new game, we each pick a relay team and the loser has to drink a shot!” Rose said, flopping down onto the couch and forcing Albus and Scorpius even closer together. “This is my favourite event.” She gestured towards the TV where the athletics still going on and sighed dramatically “All those men in tight shorts”.

 

James laughed, “Okay Rose, have another drink!”

 

Scorpius felt his heart begin to race as the teams were stretching, he chanced a glance at Albus and then had to quickly look away, Albus’ eyes were intense as he looked back at Scorpius.

 

“So Rose, which one do you fancy?” James asked breaking the tension.

 

“Well, if you’re into muscular guys its all about the Americans, but if you prefer blondes, check out team Sweden.”

 

Scorpius felt Albus head turn quickly to the TV and heard his soft exclamation as he watched the four Swedish men warming up.

 

Suddenly Scorpius felt a hand at his neck. “Their hair isn’t as shiny as yours.” Albus slurred leaning even further into Scorpius’s side and running his fingers through Scorpius hair. He didn’t seem to be aware that he had sent Scorpius heart racing. He felt frozen to the spot.

 

“Th…. Thanks” Scorpius stammered. He suddenly felt a lot more sober and was very aware of every subtle touch as Albus continued to run his hands through his hair.

 

James and Rose exchanged amused looks.

 

Albus hummed again. “And your eyes are prettier.”

 

Scorpius frowned through the embarrassment. “Albus, you’re drunk.” He mumbled.

 

“Here, this is golden like Scorpius’ skin” James laughed as he handed another glass of firewhisky to Albus.

 

Albus took the drink but didn’t acknowledge James any further.

 

James rolled his eyes. “Rose come help me find my other bottle?”

 

“We haven’t finished this one.” She paused and mouthed an “oh.” Rose stood up slowly. “See you guys in about 20 minutes?”

 

Albus frowned. “Ok, then. Are you sure you want to miss your show Rose?”

 

“Oh I think there’s going to be a much better show on later.” She whispered and followed James out of the room.

 

“Are they gone?” Scorpius asked. He couldn’t see the door from his position.

 

“Yes, I think so. Gosh I hope they come back with food as well.” Albus mumbled, flopping his arm around Scorpius’s shoulders and leaning in.

 

“I have to tell you something.” Scorpius said, very quickly and suddenly.

 

“You’re super gay.” Albus replied in a matter-of-fact tone.

 

“What?” Scorpius retreated, pulling Albus’s arm off him and sliding away. “What? How?”

 

“Ok, maybe not super gay. But somewhat gay.”

 

Scorpius was panicking. The alcohol made it difficult for him to form coherent thoughts and he was pretty sure he was opening and closing his mouth like a fish.

 

Albus slid closer to Scorpius, taking his hand in his. “Its ok, I get it.”

 

Scorpius frowned, still unable to form words.

 

Sighing, Albus lowered his voice. “I’ve never fancied a girl in my life. And I hope that someday that’s something I can be proud of. Maybe it makes me the ultimate gay or something.” He stopped, trying to get a reaction out of Scorpius. He could tell that his friend was panicking; years of watching him during exams had shown him what that looked like. His pupils dilated, the grey getting covered by black orbs staring intently at nothing. “Please, give me something.” Albus sighed again. “I was worried you’d find out but I can’t keep this from you anymore and James said he thought you might be too and I just knew I’d need some extra confidence, so I set this up. I’m sorry if you’re uncomfortable and I hope I haven’t ruined what we have.”

 

“You could never ruin anything.” Scorpius whispered. He made an effort to focus his vision onto Albus. “I was worried you would find out too. I do fancy girls. I fancy them all the time.”

 

Albus chuckled. “That’s ok!”

 

Scorpius shushed him. “I fancy them but I don’t actually want any of them. There’s already someone there.”

 

“Ok?”

 

There was a long pause. Scorpius took a deep breath but couldn’t do it. “I can’t tell you who they are.”

 

“Could you at least be gender specific?” Albus asked. In his head he would allow himself to get more hope if he said “he”.

 

Scorpius looked down, willing himself to say it. “Its not a girl.”

 

“That still isn’t gender specific, mate. You've got to get better at describing people” Albus joked.

 

Scorpius giggled. That was it. Albus the sarcastic was always there to break the tension. He forced his eyes up again. He couldn’t get words out no matter how much he wanted to shout, “it’s you!”

 

“Can I try something?” Albus asked. He didn’t know whether it was the confidence of knowing that Scorpius has the ability to feel the same way, or the fact that he knew Scorpius wasn’t disgusted with the idea of him being gay, or if it was just the alcohol but he leaned in and kissed him.

 

It was a split second, barely touching.

 

The world stopped.

 

He could feel Scorpius’s breath on his lips.

 

He might’ve been imagining it but Scorpius leant in too.

 

It wasn’t a split second anymore.

 

They were definitely touching now, chests pressed up against each other and arms wrapped so tightly around each other’s waists with the force of years of confusion and self-hate and anger and pining.

 

He felt as if he was being lifted into the air by some unknown force, unlike anything he had ever felt before.

 

Scorpius pulled back but kept Albus in his arms. Albus started to giggle, Scorpius a second behind, developing into big, belly laughs of pure joy.

 

Scorpius took a breath. “Yeah, it’s you.”

 

Albus grinned, cheeks wrinkling under the force. “And thank fuck for that.”

**Author's Note:**

> The name of the fic is purely so Manon can appreciate the use of the Mcfly lyric


End file.
